It’s strange to sing the songs we used to sing. The smile, the hugs, everything is gone. Yesterday, I found out about you. Even now, looking at you feels wrong. I didn’t want to be judged as a weak freak and camouflaged the way I feel. You know, I was delighted upon seeing your face yesterday. I wanted to run and hugged you but it’s so wrong and awkward. As planned I didn’t even shed a tear in the beginning. Wait, I thought I was strong but in the end, I surrendered. I am a cry baby and its official. Currently, I am just dumb for words. If you are reading this, I hope that you appreciate every single thing that I’ve done, the effort that I’ve given by compiling all those memories. I never, I repeat, I never ever cried badly for any situation like this. I thought this whole thing has ended but this whole thing has just started all over again.

Maybe we’re trying, trying too hard, Fadz Spade.

Dad has always been adding oil to the fire. School is just a burden. Other commitments and their ‘professional’ attitude are just getting on my nerves. Please tell me that those are just plain inceptions. Sigh, I want to wake up not to be Izzah but someone else.

And yea this semester, i am the only Malay in my class. Keyword, ONLY. Yazid's gone! Gone! Gone! Kan, Allah dah makbulkan doa kau ngan aku, Zid. :(